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Woody is a Cannibal is a Youtube Poop that was uploaded on September 9, 2012, by SC992012.

TranscriptEdit

Andy: [doing Mr. Potato Head with gun six times down] All right, everyone! This is a stickup! Don't anybody move!
[showing Luigi, Gandalf, man, Darth Vader, Pikachu, yellow face, and they all scream]
Man: Show me your moves!
Andy: Oh, no! Somebody do something!
[he holds Woody, pulls a string, and going in negative]
Voice Box: Reach for the sky!
Andy: Sheriff Woody! I'm here to you, One-Eyed Bart. Doh!
[he uses a lasso to catch a box, and going in reverse]
Andy: Yee-haw! Yee-haw! Yee-haw!
[♪ Dead or alive: You spin me right round]
[they watch them play in a football game]
Announcer: Hits the ball hard, it's good!
Andy: Score!
Announcer: They did it!
Man: Hot to rock.
Woody: All right, next. Uh, oh, yes. Tuesday night's board key was, I think, a big success. And we want to thank Mr. Spell for putting that on us. Thank you, Mr. Spell.
Mr. Spell: You're welcome.
Woody: Okay, I don't want any toys left behind. And ask buddy. If you don't have one, get one!
Rex: Any pingas-shaped ones?
Buzz: I am Buzz Lightyear.
Rex: Oh, I'm so glad yay!
Woody: You think they never seen a new toy before.
Bo: Well, sure. Look at him. He's got his Swiss Army Knife.
[presses a button, then a mouth fires]
Buzz: Please be careful. You don't want to be in the way when my laser goes off.
Mr. Potato Head: Hey, a laser! How come you don't have a laser, Woody?
Woody: All right, that's it! We're all very impressed with Andy's new wizard.
Harry: I'm a what?
Man: You're a wizard, Harry.
Buzz: Excuse me. I-I think think the word you're searching for is "Space friend Ranger."
Randy Newman: [showing in puberty] ♪ Strange things are happening to me. Strange things. ♪
[showing "Hmm... I wonder what's for dinner!"]
Randy Newman: ♪ I had friends. I had lots of friends. ♪
Yoshi: What? I have to go to bed, so soon!
Buzz: Your chief, Andy counted on me.
Together: Wow!
Bo: I know Andy's excited about Buzz, but you know, he'll always have special place for you.
Mr. Potato Head: Yeah, like the cool boat down. [chuckling]
Woody: All right, that's it!
[tonal humming sound]
Buzz: Hmm.
Robot: Tape. Mr. Lightyear wants more unidirectional bonding strip.
Buzz: [humming] Hmm?
Woody: Listen, hey, Luigi, you stay away from Andy. He's mine, and no one is taking him away from me.
Buzz: What are you talking about? Where's that bonding strip?
[beeping sound]
Woody: And another thing: Stop with this space fan thing! It's getting on my nerves!
Buzz: Are you saying you wanna lodge to complaint with Star Command?
Woody: Oh-ho! Okay! Ooh, well, so you want to do it the hard way, huh?
Buzz: Don't even think about it, cowboy.
Woody: Oh, yeah? Tough guy?
[flips the helmet open]
Man: What the fuck!
[farting]
Woody: Will Andy pick me?
[liquid swishing]
[shows a man dancing, then groans, and yells, rolling the Magic 8 Ball down, farting]
Man: Wheelbarrow roll!
Woody: Buzz, Buzz, Buzz, Buzz, Buzz! Oh, Buzz! Buzz Lightyear. [panting] Buzz Lightyear, thank goodness. We've got Trouble!
Buzz: Trouble? Where? I am Buzz Lightyear I come.
Together: Ooh!
Sid: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
Man: Yes!
Sid: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! Hannah! Janie's all batter now.
[Hannah goes the screaming remix, and gun firing at Buzz]
Buzz: Mayday, mayday. Come in, Star Command. Send reinforcements. Star Command, do you copy? I set my laser from stun to kill.
Woody: Aw, great. Great. Yeah, and if anyone attacks us, we can... [doing a mouth with a blue laser] ...'em to death.
[rustling]
Rex: Hey, you, guys! I think I found him! Buzz, is that you?
[cat yowls]
Link: Oh, boy!
Rex: Link, will you get outta of here! You're interfering with the search and rescue!
Sid: Where's the rebel base? Talk! I can see your will is strong. [using a chainsaw] Well, we have ways of making you talk. [he uses a chainsaw to cut Woody's head] Where are your rebel friends now? [sinister chuckle]
Sid's Mom: Sid, your Pop Tarts are ready!
Sid: All right!
[sizzling continues]
[screaming]
Man: I wonder what's for dinner!
[growling]
Buzz: Split up!
[Scud growling]
[he goes in and out the door multiple times, then Buzz watches Imagine by John Lennon, and a lizard]
Slinky Dog: See? It is Buzz. Now give back the lights, Potato Head.
Mr. Potato Head: Wait just a minute. What are you tryin' to pull?
Woody: [shows the blood in Buzz's arm] Nothing!
[screaming]
[he continues with the blood in Buzz's arm]
[group murmuring]
[grunts, retches]

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